Green Jello Hotdish

Whoever ordered this 90+ degree weather, return it. Do it now. Without further delay. Third miserable night in a row last night; I can’t sleep through a whole night without waking up because I’m drowning in my own sweat.

Last night got to hang out with one of my roommates. We drove up to Racine for no real purpose other than the opportunity to waste gas in a cool air conditioned vehicle. Chatted about work, stupid people, life in general. She challenged me to read more, which is something I’ve wanted to do, but I don’t get a lot of time to do. It’s also hard to keep my attention in writing. The editor in me wants to scream at any misplaced or misused word, phrase, punctuation, etc.

I don’t read a lot of fiction, and I have a low tolerance for creative writing. My favorite book is The New York Times with the Chicago Tribune and Minneapolis Star Tribune as runners-up. I consider it a good day if I get a chance to read updates from The Times or the Toronto Star. I subscribe to 25+ newsgroups, 40 blogs and countless listservs are delivered to my inbox.

But, I want to read more and I’m going to do it for my roommate. I’ve developed a list of books I want to read here, so buy them for me if you’re so inclined. (Shameless plug for gifts!)

Ah, yes. Another bright sunny morning. Another day of work at Carthage.

The EVS lady assigned to the building I work in needs professional psychological treatment. Currently, she’s on the house phone in the lobby area lecturing Security for unlocking rooms. Now, this wouldn’t be a problem, except for a few things:

1. She has nothing to do with unlocking rooms. She cleans rooms. Unlocking rooms and scheduling is coordinated by my office, not Security or EVS.
2. She thinks that the office phone number is her personal office line, and that those of us who work the front desk are her personal secretaries. She’ll give out this number exclusively when she makes appointments, etc, and then stops back to check if she has any messages.
3. Every morning when she vacuums, she makes sure to do a very good job of the large meeting spaces before people are in there. However, she apparently missed the memo to do the office spaces before people are trying to do work. Like clockwork, she begins to vacuum the lobby and offices at 10:00 a.m., not a reasonable hour before we’re on the telephone, helping people at the counter, etc. And how about mopping the floor once in a while?

Moving along. I answer the college switchboard through most of the day, and I’m about ready to just reject all calls. Let me say this once, and then we’ll be done: if someone calls from anywhere on campus from our 7,000 phone extensions, it will show up as “Carthage College 262-551-8500.” Please, for the love of God, do not just return the call because it showed up on your caller ID and say, “Someone from this number called me. Why?”

I don’t know why. No, I can’t transfer you to someone who does know why. Were you expecting a call from Carthage College? Do you know someone at Carthage College? Do you attend Carthage College? Yes, Carthage College is just that–a college, an institute of higher education and learning. Yes, you really did just call a college.

The switchboard operator is a smart cookie. We know where to transfer you, we know the names of many of the people that work on campus. We know standard acronyms, like IT and AP, and we have a number of our own. Please, for the children’s sake, simply ask for the extension you want. Don’t waste our time and yours with unnecessary stories, riddles or other information.

“Carthage College Operator.”
“Yes, hi, my name is I.N. Payne, maybe you can help me. Last week I fell down a number of stairs and broke both of my legs and arms, it’s amazing I’m making this phone call at all. I work as an investment broker so I’m pretty set during my rehabilitation period, but I worry about it sometimes, you know. Anyway, I’m looking to speak to someone about a student loan for my daughter. I think that would be in the Financial Aid office?”

All of that, taking up a precious minute of my time, just to go to the Financial Aid office. Seriously. Now imagine having three other calls banked behind that one and having to listen to that guy, while other people are having the phone ring twelve times, then calling back to yell at you and tell their own stories about how the phone rang twelve times and their cat got lost during that time and then a crow flew down from the sky and ate it, and how that cat was 18 years old and the old lady’s only companion but can you send her to the President’s Office?

Then there are the conference guests themselves. I wouldn’t ever speak ill about them, but let’s just say groups are forming on thefacebook. And we may be in need of installing gas chambers on certain floors of Tarble and Denhart Halls. Where am I supposed to eat when there are 500 people upstairs in the cafeteria and only room for 400 of us to sit? I pay good money to go to school here and eat this disgusting food. The least I can get in return is a place to set my tray and my ass while I’m eating it, without running into all these damn kids, camp counselors, etc. This place is my home; I don’t remember letting all these brats inside.

I love living in the ghetto of Kenosha. Before I get into this further, I want to re-state that I wouldn’t live anywhere else in the city. Life in the Lincoln Park area really is quite good; the neighbors are nice, the streets are (mostly) clean and I’ve never once had a problem living here.

But can we do something about the screaming?

Across the street from us is a duplex, one of the last remaining on the block. Apparently mom and dad are just “friends,” and since junior’s popped up out of nowhere, now they have to fight over what’s going on. Daily. Constantly. Loudly. Complete with sides for each one. It’s like the rumble on The Outsiders or West Side Story out there. Come on, I just need to get to my car, and you’re blocking it.

Down the road a bit, the people on the corner have a fascination for fireworks, which is fine, but there’s nothing to celebrate. And for sure there can’t be something to celebrate nightly. I grew up in Minnesota–those things are illegal there. I’m not used to this whole screeching noise with pops and flashes. The first time one went off was hilarious–it was the night Aaron and Madeline stayed with us; Janine, Madeline and I were hanging out in the living room watching who knows what on the TV when we heard the small explosion. All of us, good Minnesotan kids we are, thought the sound was gunshots. Turned off all the lights in the house and sat in the middle of the room on the floor. Yup. Sort of like the days of duck and cover, except without the hilarious classroom films.

My personal favorite, though, is our need within the house to be “good neighbors.” When we start to get loud, we all try and quiet ourselves down. Like it really matters when you’re living in the ghetto. The arguments across the street will just overpower us anyway, so what’s the use?

In other news, I worked on some newspaper stuff today. Got the rate sheet done, hired an account representative and finished up a slew of other work that I had been procrastinating on. Now I just have to follow through with all of that, and I might even be able to take some time off in July!

I’ve come to notice that there are a number of people reading this, thanks to cool traffic monitoring, and yet nobody is commenting. Here’s the cool thing about Blogger that didn’t exist over at Xanga: you don’t have to have an account on here to comment. Just click on “Comment” and be on your way. Make me feel special, like these increasingly-frequent updates are worthwhile. Comment!

Started to write a novel today. We’ll see if I can finish this time. Found a couple of online publishers, which would be cool. Make sure to buy my novel…whenever I get it out.

Nothing really interesting happened today. Part of the Patriot Act was reversed today, thank God. Hopefully the rest of it can be reversed. Edited in the basement of Hedberg all day, and now I’m also working on some new brochures for Fluffy Moose. Yippee.

Class started just fine. Have to work on a ceremonial speech and nine chapters with quizzes. Gotta get up on that; probably will tomorrow night.

From May/June 2005 issue of Relevant:

“As a Christian, I feel very shut out from a lot of contemporary Christianity. My understanding in what it means to be a Christian is to, in our own subjective way, recognize Christ as being God, and recognize our shortcomings and our failings, and try and live according to the teachings of Christ as best we can. And what I find so strange is I look at the behavior of so many Christians, and I don’t see any aspect of the teachings of Christ represented there. But [I remember] the quote about taking the log out of your own eye before you can see the speck in someone else’s eye, so I don’t want to get in the position of judging other Christians. I fully admit that a lot of my actions and a lot of things that are still in my life are inconsistent with my beliefs as a Christian. I’m very secular.” -Moby

Today’s Star Tribune has an interesting column by Steve Berg (a member of Mount Olive, my home congregation in Minneapolis) about the occupation in Iraq. He presents that it is an easy question to ask–and one that needs to be asked: Why are we in Iraq?

(In case you missed the secret Downing Street memorandum, from U.S. President George Bush to U.K. Prime Minister Tony Blair, its contents all but laid out the roadmap that eight months prior to invasion, Bush had decided to invade Iraq, using all means necessary, including fabricating evidence. It’s published here, with commentary from the Times and Washington Post.)

Berg’s column creates a laundry list of possible reasons why we are in Iraq, ranging from the ridiculous to the extremely logical. All are downright frightening, and much of the rhetoric is not tongue-in-cheek, but what has been heard for the past four years on mainstream American and international media.

A. To remove the chemical, biological and possibly nuclear weapons that Saddam Hussein was about to hand over to the terrorists, posing an imminent threat to U.S. security.

A. To sever the link between the 9/11 terrorists and the Iraqi dictator.

A. To remove a brutal and despotic menace to stability in the Middle East.

A. To establish an Iraqi democracy as a model for change in the Islamic world.

A. To make the world safer.

A. To “finish the job” that Bush’s father started in the Gulf War, and to avenge Saddam’s apparent attempt to assassinate the elder Bush.

A. To secure Iraq’s oil supply, thus perpetuating America’s dependence on petroleum rather than launching a major drive toward energy independence.

A. To divert attention from the fact that we were unlikely to find Osama bin Laden and to concentrate instead on an enemy we could easily defeat on the open battlefield.

A. To attract terrorists from around the world to fight a consolidated war against the United States at a remote site, far from American soil.

A. To create a bigger, more telegenic war than the one in Afghanistan in order to appeal to the rising conservative tide at home — especially after 9/11 — and to win back the Senate for Republicans.

A. To slap down a dictator that the United States had helped in the past, especially in his war against Iran, but who then turned on his American benefactors.

A. To launch a latter-day crusade against Islam.

A. To do a favor for Israel.

A. To demonstrate that the United States is the world’s only superpower and that it’s willing to act in defiance of allies and apart from the United Nations.

A. None, some or all of the above.

What makes me the most sick throughout all of this is not the war itself, not the death and destruction that it has caused and not those who sit idly by and support the war, calling any who simply ask the question, “Why?” anti-American, unpatriotic, etc. For certain these things irritate me, make me sad and question the very fabric of humankind, but they don’t make me the most sick.

The fact that media coverage of the war in the American mainstream is spotty at best, missing at worst and abandons the principles of a free press makes me ill to my stomach. When other countries are reporting more about America than America is reporting about itself, other countries without a so-called free press that have more to lose legislatively than the American press, there is a problem. When journalists are so lazy and afraid of their news operation’s advertisers that they willingly accept being embedded with troops as opposed to independent research, there is a problem. When the American people no longer value a true, issues and information-based journalism market, there is a problem.

Great, so we have a problem. Two, in fact. We’re in a country with no exit strategy, and we’ve got a media that doesn’t work. Halfway around the world, people are dying in the hundreds daily. American service women and men are giving their lives for a war–which we are now learning more and more was not only unavoidable, founded on false pretenses but had no purpose from the beginning. Iraqi civilians, already trying to survive in brutal conditions, are now trying to stay alive just one more day in a war-torn country.

And here at home, we’re suffering the same death. The death of our intelligence and mental well-being.

Not really. A couple of groups are checking out; we have a group checking in tomorrow. One of the “bigger, fancier” groups is in today–I spaced and wore jeans. Oops.

I’m moving over to Blogger from Xanga. I like the interface a little better, and when I finally get around to updating my personal Web site, I’ll be able to better integrate everything. Decided on “The Screed” as the name of the new blog. Don’t know why; I remember reading that somewhere once and it stuck. Have no clue what it means.

Does anyone know the keyboard shortcut for switching between tabs on Firefox for Mac? On Safari, it’s command-shift-arrow, but that doesn’t work in Firefox.

Interesting thread in one of the political forums I watch. The most amusing isn’t the conservative vs. liberal argument, instead it’s the complete faulty logic used by one of the posters:

I’d like to address this constant reference to “Blessed are the peacemakers”, as an attempt to further your anti-American and leftist views. Some take quotes from Sermon on the Mount, and make ethical mistakes with it. Deadissue, the Sermon on the Mount is a declaration of personal Christian ethics, not the rules corporations and states should be run by. If you read Romans Chapter 13, you will see how God says governments should be run: with justice,
mercy and grace.

First off, merely disagreeing with someone does not make them “anti-American,” and being “leftist” doesn’t cut the bill, either. Have we really degenerated so much as a society that civil, tactful, intelligable debate is lost? But I digress.

The poster is correct, that the Sermon on the Mount is a declaration of personal Christian ethics. However, at last check, corporations and states are also run by persons, and when those persons confess to be Christians, then they should run their corporations and states under the same ethics.

Moreover, governments being run by “justice, mercy and grace,” as the poster points out, are built upon the assumption that their leaders follow the same ethics as outlined in the Sermon on the Mount. Without those ethics being in place, the rest of the assumption falls apart.