Pet peeves
Everyone has pet peeves. They are often irrational, frequently overblown, and almost always inconsequential in the grand scheme of life. I’ve run into a number of my own recently:
- Using the handicapped automatic door opener for no reason. There are times to use this device beyond its intended purpose, and it certainly helps. For example, when one is carrying a large object(s) and can use their force to push the button, but grabbing a door handle to open might not be as easy or practical. Or if one is using a cart, bag, or other rolling object to get through the doorway. But when walking up to the door with nothing in one’s arms? No. This is ridiculous. It is simply wasteful and rubs me the wrong way.
- Couples taking up an entire sidewalk or footpath. The public right-of-way is not reserved simply for two people. Appropriate etiquette requires groups of people to fall into single-file on either side of the walk for proper passing and efficient movement. Do not curse at me when I refuse to move, exactly the same thing you are doing, and you run into me. It’s not necessary for me to get muddy shoes simply because you have entitlement issues.
- Exceptional, fake niceness. For some people, it’s genuine. Others are trying a little too hard. In the case of the latter, it’s time to take the espresso down a few notches and realize that life isn’t one giant bag of sunshine and rainbows. There’s no reason to be rude, but there’s also no reason for over-the-top pep at 9 a.m.
- People who are in the turn lane, one car behind you, who find it necessary to fly around you and cut in again at the last possible moment just to slam on their brakes. This should be self-explanitory. You saved no time in doing that, but simply look like a moron. Promptly report to the DMV and surrender your driving privileges. (Also closely related to people who stop five car lengths behind an intersection at a red light.)
- Bicyclists in Chicago. The end.
I’m sure I’m missing some; these are just those I could think of in the last two days.
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Daniel Ross-Jones serves as Minister for Youth & Young Adults at First Congregational Church of Palo Alto, United Church of Christ. Living in the San Francisco Bay Area for a time still measured in months, he is frequently getting lost and discovering treasures of a landscape very different from his Upper Midwestern roots. Green Jello Hotdish is a blog exploring the intersections of his days. 
